Journal entries of an Australian romuvis- Vision quest 1990 (20yrs old)

This journal was written at a time in my life after I had moved to Sydney and found a wealth of knowledge on all things occult. Wollongong, where I finished my schooling, had no occult bookshops except for of in a terrace house in Kiama and I had a real thirst for the answers to questions that I didn't even know at the time. I was looking for something but I just didn't know what at the time. I had read lots of different kinds of books on topics concerning various styles of divination, astral projection, meditation and spiritual awakening exercises. I joined a secret Order of Kabbalists where I studied and practiced the Golden Dawn system of magic. I had read books about the North American Indian custom of vision quest and it really inspired me to do my own personal Vision Quest to find my own vision for my life. Traditionally the rite of Vision Quest usually performed after time spent in the sweat lodge which is a type of sauna. I did not perform the sweat lodge because it was too difficult to organise here in Australia. I did however, adhere to the other customs of fasting while on the journey and opening my ears to the local Spirits and my totems who wish to guide me. I had the understanding that the Totems would look after me and if it so happened that my time was up and I had a fatal accident on this Quest, then it wouldn't matter if I was in the middle of wildness or crossing a busy city street, if my time was up then my time was up. I was pretty confident that my guides would protect me and that it wasn't my time to leave this life yet so I organised a friend to drop me off at Yeola in Kangaroo Valley and I started my own Vision quest.

June 2,1990.
Kangaroo Valley, NSW.

Well, here I am sitting at the top of the mountain. What a climb! Must be at least 80 degree climb through dense trees and vines that kept dragging me back, as if silent warnings telling me that, "this is not your home!". I saw so many animal homes everywhere whether it be a hole in the ground, tree or rotten log. I just know that this place is secretly alive. I saw lots of different types of faeces on the ground making me wonder, "who left that?!". After all the fumbles, tumbles and crawling on all 4's today, I feel  that I faced the challenge put before me, (with a bloody heavy backpack!). I feel humbled especially having to make the journey mostly on hand and knee. I persevered and conquered the challenge!

It only took me near on 5 hours to scale this mountain, but I was buggered. I pushed myself to my limits, and then, even a bit further. I feel good even though  I lost a water bottle over a cliff and had to carry the other one upside down because it had a HOLE in the bottom! I now get to relax here, looking down on the valley. It's a fantastic view! 

I can only just see the top of farmer Joe's house roof, I'm not close enough to the edge and the trees are too tall. Such a beautiful vista. I feel like I'm peering down from the top of the world and I have a better perspective on the full picture of my life. I've been sitting here for almost 5 hours, meditating while looking over the valley.

The Sun has just sunk down below the horizon and I am having to write with the light from a candle so I'd better set up camp for the night.

I set up the tent and have a good fire going. There's heaps of good burning wood up here. I can't wait for the Stars to come out, I know they'll be brilliant!

3rd June,1990.

What a night! The millions of twinkling stars in the night sky amazed me, awed me and once again humbled me even further. I felt my own insignificance in this universe but I still feel somehow integral to it's overall workings. I am sure that there is a reason for my existence despite being such an infinitesimal part of the universe.

In saying that after several hours of meditation and star gazing, the rest of the night was spent being scared out of my wits. I thought there was lots of animals living onon the slopes of the mountain but there seems to be so many more up here on the top. There were lots of Kangaroos and other nocturnal marsupials and birds. The night was filled with sounds of loud thuds, marsupials screaming, owls screeching and the eerie creaking of eucalypt branches. I was really scared. It's not like camping in the main camping area. I was so afraid that I'd camped in some animals territory which I would have to defend my little spot. Luckily, I didn't because I really would've done if I was put in that situation but I survived the night without confrontation. 

I'm sitting here, looking over the valley and watching the rising Sun. What a welcome sight! As the light grows in strength, I can see there are large trampled spots all over the place showing signs of the night activity. The mountain is alive with the sounds of all sorts of morning bird songs. It is like listening to an ambiance music cd! So relaxing! I still feel that I am a PART of nature but not yet have found harmony WITH nature. The world of humankind from where I come, is very far from natures cycles and her laws, but I feel that this is a major goal that I must pursue to achieve in my life.

Well after lots of determination and a hard slog, I am now past the top of the waterfall. I spent many an hour gazing up from the base of the waterfall and often wondered what lay beyond and now I'm finally here! The land is so steep and dense with vines that kept dragging me back. I had to cut myself free so many times!

I found myself sliding on one leg sideways down the slope and when my leg slid into a hole, up to my thigh. I just stopped still, got my leg out of the hole and continued sliding. My Guides must be looking after me. I could have broken my leg if I kept sliding when my leg fell into the hole. 

My back pack seems to be handling the journey pretty well so far although I dread the thought of the trek back up the mountain slope. It's going to be a hard trip! I had to stop every 50 meters to have a break and to ensure that everything is still fastened. I lost my axe somewhere on the way and now don't have any water bottles, but I'm sure the Great Spirit(Rainbow Serpent) must have been a reason, so I just kept pushing forward.

I've learnt that my personal motto of, "constantly learning=constantly growing", is false or at least, not true for me anymore. I feel that the way I am growing out here in the wilderness is by adapting. All these trees, ferns and animals don't grow because of learning but by adapting to their surroundings within their universe. the terrain here is so harsh and in the inhabitants can be so hostile that I am always wary where I step. 

All these creatures have survived because they adapted and now it's my turn!  I feel that I am awakening to a deeper understanding within me and I don't know where it will take me but I am learning to be adaptable really quickly. I've had to crawl on all 4s like a babe in this wilderness with much to learn.

With the sound of the flowing water of the River, I set up camp and now have a little fire going. I'm resting at last and time to consult my tarot deck out of interest and further guidance. I used a 7 card layout where the 4th card represents the main energy at play in my life.

I used only the trumps of the Thoth deck which I shuffled and dealt while concentrating on the sound of the River and the Birds songs. These are the cards that I drew from the deck:

16. Tower'

6. Lovers (reversed) Zain-7

8. Strength Teh-9

14. Temperance (reversed) Samekh-60

2. High Priestess Gamel-3

1. The Magician (reversed) Bes-2

3. The Empress Daleth-4

Attributes of Binah understanding, the colour red, life, Rainbow Serpent come through strongly with this reading.

When meditating on the first card, the Tower, I feel that it relates to the destruction of the self who I thought I was, surrendering my ego and pride of the self that I knew. The transformation is clearly related to Kether the Crown and the infinite white light that streams through everything in existence including myself. I feel that there may even be karmic forces at work The 4 lightening bolts on the card stop short of Hod(Sephiroth of glory), relating to my own ego. Interesting to note the energy flow through Binah(Sephiroth of understanding). How appropriate!! In the picture on the card, I see the crown being usurped is the false crown. Probably the crown of my ego. Balance is also a strong impression from the card.

When meditating on the Lovers card, I feel inspiration that will continue to motivate me to join with the universal power. I also feel that there are negative relationship issues that need to be dealt with because the card is reversed. 

The strength card is obvious to me as an expression of what I've needed to make this journey. The strength to crawl through the thousands of spiky vines that constantly cling to anything, hair, clothes, backpack and even skin! Not to mention the weight of my bloody backpack!! The woman pictured on the card symbolises Goddess Binah who teaches me the lesson of strength and the endurance to rach my goal of enlightenment. This Binah energy is so strong out here in the sticks and in the middle of no where. The Darwinian concept of' "the strongest survives" comes to mind and I accept the challenge!!!

The 3 cards combined speak much to me in relation to the reasons for me being on this vision Quest. To quote the bible, " Break me, melt me, mold me and remake me oh lord. My lord is Binah right now and she is doing a pretty good job. I've always had the desire to better myself and inspired to contemplate my own place and purpose in the universe. I've only ever wanted what was best for me and those around me. I'm not sure why I'm being led this way but I do feel that there are karmic forces at work in my life. I do have a strong fate line on my palm after all!

I feel that the High Priestess card relates to my own self transformation in the wilderness and may relate to a distant future role where I may be a priest in my own right. Not  a Christian priest of course but a priest of human kind and the universe perhaps.

The Magician card also relates back to how difficult this transformation may be but goes further to warn that there were some people that I was working with magicall in the Order that I should be wary of but if I use wisdom then I will be ,"a little bit closer" to true wisdom by better understanding of myself and where I fit in the universe. (Chokmah and Binah)

I feel The Empress card is telling me that I must accept a life of humility and servitude by royal appoint I see a beautiful person is emerging where balance and moderation is a way of life.

Final card is Temperance, reversed. This card  summarises my own inner realisation, and most importantly, action needed to fulfill my destiny.

It's getting dark, I'm getting wary and a bit scared so I'm going to do some meditating soon. Signing off for now.

4th June, 1990.

Well I finally got through the night! What a freezing night that it was! I kept waking every hour from the cold. I got up this morning waiting or rather praying for sunshine but it never came. I found my herbal tea bags. I made a good fire and boiled some water. it was great to have something warm! I really enjoy how slow life seems to be going out here, even making a cup of tea seems to take so long and I could imagine this is how my ancestors lived. 

I'm at the top of the waterfall which is in a valley between two towering cliffs which met further up the river. I packed up the campsite and left my back pack in a safe place before going further up the river. What a fantastic world this is!!! I made my way upstream between these 2 mighty cliffs which join before me in a massive canyon where thunders a beautiful waterfall. It is twice as big as the waterfall downstream . The cliffs must be at least 350 meters high and the waterfall seems to be even higher! Massive boulders fill the canyon like giant pebbles of weightless Styrofoam but I know they must weigh tonnes each.

The waterfall signifies the end of the journey but not the end of my quest. I feel relaxed and content with how far I've reached although the towering cliffs seem to boast of a further hidden glory of hidden beauty, almost seeming to mock my success. I am still happy! I can see the rainbow in the mist of the waterfall and reminds me that the mighty Rainbow Serpent is the great Spirit of this land. The cool wind spreads this mist across much of the canyon. I am just sitting here looking with wide eyes at the beauty and harshness of this isolated place. I just soaked it all in! After a little while, I am soaked through with water now, wind blown and covered in earth from my journey. 

I gathered some rocks and built my rock pile and meditated concentrating on my breath and the sound of the waterfall. It was an amazing meditation and I really felt comforted, inspired and encouraged to continue my quest to discover the real me. The light is starting to dwindle here in the valley and it's almost time for me to trek back to the top of the first waterfall, so I thank the Spirits for their guidance and protection. Without it,I couldn't have made it this far unscathed.

I'm exhausted!! I set up camp for the night and started a fire. I think I will rest well tonight.

5th of June,1990.

I left early this morning, refreshed after good nights sleep and a few cups of nice herbal tea. The mountain climb was very steep and crawled much of the way with dense canopy overhead that I could only see small patches of sky. I saw lots of funnel web spider homes but luckily they seemed to be more afraid of me, I think, I hope...  I didn't actually see any, thankfully. I found my lost ax as i climbed the slope! Yay!!

I searched for an open space where the Sun could shine but it was difficult. I did fin a large rock and climbed up to it's top, above the canopy. What a view looking down the slope, covered by dense green foliage like carpet. I could see down to where the mountain fell off at the first waterfall and then up to the ancient cliffs on the other side of the valley, that represented a barricade to other unseen beauty and harshness. 

It was on the top of that rock that I questioned myself. I asked the Spirits why i was doing this when most people have have a relaxing week end at home or attending BBQs while others are searching for their path in much more comfortable and safe ways. What the bloody hell am i doing here? I felt the answer deep in my soul. It didn't matter how others find their light within, I just had to tread this particular path to find my own path that will lead to enlightenment. It was at this moment that all the crawling, fear, sweating, dragging, falling, tripping and blisters seem to be worth it. I am grateful for the experience and I believe that the victory that I have achieved on this quest will glorify the soul and create a stronger foundation on which to grow further.

I found that my compass was broken in my pocket so I just found my bearings with the sun and crawled off in the right direction. I reached the summit, scratched, bleeding, sore and sweating profusely. I was still in the darkness of the canopy but found some wombat trails that led me to a spring. I was pretty dehydrated by that time and just drank and drank and drank. I had nothing to hold water in and only had about 2 hours of light left so I decided that it was time to get down from the mountain before darkness set in.

I found a very large animal track half way down the mountain. It was almost as wide as a road. I was virtually running down this track which lead to another creek. I had a drink and climbed down another steep hill and found another track that took me all the way to the bottom of the mountain. No one was here, I was still alone. I went down to the river and lay down on my stomach with my face in the water drinking like there's no tomorrow. I must have looked like the wild man from Borneo with long hair, beard and covered in dirt. I waived to farmer Joes wife as she drove past, she was oblivious to what I had just been through. I was buggered!! my Vision Quest was over or perhaps it was just starting.

6th of June, 1990.

Last night, I retrieved the food that I hid in the bushes before I left and had a nice meal. First food in 4 days and it felt good to finally have something in my stomach. I slept well last night despite waking up crying from a bad dream. it was unusual because I don't usually even remember my dreams, let alone wake up crying from them. I got a good fire and just sat by it, stoking it all day as I was just too sore and exhausted to do anything else. I had many a conversation with the fire and somehow sorted out some more issues that needed addressing. I contemplated on the earth shattering experiences of the last few days and came to a few conclusions. I learnt that I am like everyone else, no better, no worse. Anyone else who finding transformation in their own journey will have to go through their own set of trials and tribulations depending on what is needed evolve. Some people aren't even destined to achieve this understanding in this lifetime. That's ok, there is no superiority complexes needed because we're all on the same journey. Some are closer to the goal and others further away but as a human race, we're all in the same boat. Spiritual transformation will always cause a change in personal habits and not necessarily in the same way as I did. I have also come to understand that everyone else has their own way of dealing with life and finding their path. Just because i went out in the wilderness to learn about myself and the universe doesn't mean this way is any better than anyone elses way or is even relevant for everybody in their journey.

One of my major issue of my past has been my ego and my attachments to material possessions. I used to take pride in the advanced understandings that I had for my age and also for the path that was treading. I was becoming like a new born again Christian. I felt like I had found such incredible and life changing revelations that I would try and tell as many people as possible thinking that they would see the same truths. Many people don't and simply find it offensive to have their own personal views challenged, unsolicited(unasked for). 

I have found that most people are happy with their allotment in life and just care for any uncertain change.The path that others have chosen in their life isn't any less important than my own to them and i have no right to look down on anyone or think that I need to save anyone, or so I used to think. There are many roads to the same destination. Some take longer paths and some take shorter ones, but none is any better than the other, simply easier or harder. Some people must travel a very difficult path and others may travel a seeming blessed path in order to reach the same destination. It may take several lifetimes to reach the same degree of enlightenment. Therefore, I have learnt that unless someone asks for my opinion, I don't need to give it. It is my ego that drives me to be a kind of savior and I no longer feel the need to speak to everyone I meet about the truths that I have found. This realisation has led me to believe that proselytizing edifies my ego only feeds my vanity, which are not attractive qualities of myself which I want to develop. I hope that this realisation will manifest in my personality, nevertheless, i will keep a conscious check on my superiority complex.

My motto in life has now become, "Constantly adapting, constantly growing". This motto has become so important to me over the last few days. I realise that it was easy to become exasperated and even infuriated with getting caught on vines and having to crawl on all 4s. It would have been easy to say stuff it and thrown in the towel if I wasn't will to adapt to my environment. I didn't give up and the benefits that I reaped were multitudinous. I can relate this motto to so many situations and circumstances that I've been in and will be in. In saying that the wilderness the Spirits that exist there have changed me as a person, I will not be crawling home on all 4's.

I also learnt that the gods and local spirits do care for me and kept me safe on the journey. There were so many times when I could have been injured, stranded or even died, but I didn't. Some locals told me that there are many tiger snakes in the hills! Luckily, I did the quest in Winter, when they weren't breeding! (That's when they are most aggressive).

I could have broken my leg and been stranded with no help in the middle of the wilderness. I found animal trails to springs so that I could drink when I had no water bottles. I was really looked after!

I continued to camp at Yeola for another week and had organised for family and friends to meet there for my 20th birthday celebration. I worked hard to prepare termite dip, tree fern frond salad and nettle soup but they wouldn't eat my food and would only eat their own!

I hope you enjoyed reading my journal notes from this experience. feel free to leave a comment or follow! 

Discovering the Spirit of Romuva-The Sun

In the stillness, just before dawn, the Goddess Breksta glides among the fog, when grand dreams of the future echoes still stir in sleeping minds. Breksta hands on the reigns to Goddess Saule, the Sun, as her golden rays pierce the darkness. 

Saule lets down her shining amber braids and makes the world warm with her growing glow as she spins her web of light. Like an enduring mother, Saule rises refreshed, as a large radiant disc, from the distant horizon tirelessly and reliably every day.  Saule makes the sky dance with colors of red and gold. Birds everywhere herald her return with such beautiful songs. 

Riding on Her chariot drawn by the twin horses, Saule climbs higher in the sky and grows smaller but her heat and light has grown to full strength. The whole of creation copes with dear Saule differently, some bask in her life giving sustenance when the harvest of crops are abundant. Some suffer her devastating destruction of their crops fail because of drought and searing heat. Some animals prefer to hide away from the Saule the Sun Goddess and sleep while she journeys across the sky. Some animals revel in the sunshine and day. Regardless of what else goes on in the world, dear Saule makes her journey across the sky every day. 

If you are lucky, you may even see her most beautiful daughter Star who accompanies her mother and travels the same path across the sky. Some may know her as the morning Star, Ausrine, and some may know her as the evening star, Vakarine, some may simply know her as Venus. always preceding and preparing for her mother’s risings and settings. On special occasions can be seen together on what astronomers call the Venus Transit.  

Finally after the long day, Saule sinks to the horizon, leaving the world with another breathtaking grand vista of light and colors. Saule is large and engorged again, satisfied with her day of spinning, she sinks below the horizon and the world is once again the domain of the nocturnal Deities and when the Witches and Devils are free to roam.

This story explains the symbolism seen in the ornamentation of the distaff used in Lithuanian spinning wheels. (The spinning wheel is also a symbol of the Sun.) The large disc represents the rising and setting Sun and the smaller disc represents the Sun when she is seen high in the sky. Lithuanians of old believed in the different life energy of the two different Suns. For example, certain rituals, songs and chants would be performed at the rising and setting of the Sun. This was the special time of day that had more accessible power. Other songs and dances were often performed in the day during harvesting and rejoicing the Gods and Goddesses, ensuring prosperity in the fields.

This short story represents a combination of various Lithuanian folktales that reveal the ancient Lithuanian world view/feeling and, I feel, fairly accurately condenses folklore into a mythology that was relevant to my Ancestors and relevant to myself as an Australian Lithuanian Romuvis, living in the 21^st century. My personal rituals are performed at sunrise and sunset because it is the time of day when the world is calm and peaceful. These times are magical and important for increased energy in my most important workings. Respect for the Sun has always been a part of Australian culture, being raised with the “Slip, Slop, Slap” campaign to prevent skin cancer which led to the medical understanding that vitamin E from the Sun was important to overall health. There are many Australian Aboriginal tribes who also relate to the Sun as a Goddess like the Lithuanians and I certainly feel the association just “feels right” for me, but as I always say, “It doesn’t matter what gender, imagery or name a person may associate with a deity, the personal connection is what is important.” So in all, I feel that understanding the mythology of my Lithuanian ancestors concerning the Sun has helped me to connect to the life of the Sun and reminding me that life is contained in everything, animate and inanimate.

Other myths from folktales about the Sun say that:

*According to Lithuanian folklore,Saule was forged by Kalvelis, the Blacksmith God who threw her into the sky. Kalvelis is honoured each year at the beginning of Spring when the Suns life giving energies return to the earth.

*According to Lithuanian folklore, the Sun Goddess, Saule was married to Menulis, the Moon God. Together they parented all the Star daughters and our Mother Earth. Earth was very dear to Saule and the most beautiful of their daughters was Venus. According to folklore, The Moon God had an affair with Venus and when Saule found out She scratched his face viciously to reveal the craters that we see today. Dievas, the Sky God sent Perkunas, the Thunderer to smite the moon with his sword and break him into little pieces which he endures every month with waxing and waning.

Discovering the Spirit of Romuva-The power of words

Romuva is a name given to the ancient Lithuanian and Baltic way of living revived in the modern world, in a modern context. The journey to the discovery of Romuva for me has been life long and enjoyable. Romuva is still continuing to give me joyous revelations every day through my own daily and yearly adherence to the ancient Lithuanian customs, as they relate to me as an Australian Lithuanian and living in Australia. The key to unlocking the wisdom of my Ancestors was found in reading the many folktales still preserved in volumes recorded by various Ethnographers, who thankfully wrote in English as well.+ The reading* of the folktales is certainly not limited to Lithuanian tales but those from all indigenous people around the world. The tales of all indigenous people are remnants of my Ancestors in this life and also from many other previous lives that I've lived through. It is however the Lithuanian tales that have revealed to me, an ancient mythology and morality of my Ancestors. The Tales revealed a refreshingly simple and seemingly logical worldview/feeling and morality, that I was easily able to relate to, in my current life.

Another key that helped me to find the Spirit of Romuva was in studying the language and grammar of Lithuanian language. I was not raised speaking Lithuanian and what I have learnt is mostly self taught. I still have much problem with pronunciation, some words are real tongue twisters and correct pronunciation and inflexion is paramount, for people to understand what you are saying. I have sung with the Sydney Lithuanian folk choir for around 10 years and learnt many of the correct prononciations. The experience with the choir also gave me a deeper understanding of the emotive power of Lithuanian words and especially when sung. Lithuanian language is very expressive and has many diminutives. For example, there are 80 words for Mother. I don't know them all but they are varying terms of endearment. So as you could imagine that learning vocab is an ongoing quest. I believe that the words spoken by my ancestors in prayers, chants and songs, have a very real power and energy that raises energy in the individual speaking/singing the words and those who hear them. 

All words have power, and singing the words makes them more powerful. I experienced such a raising of energy when I was in Lithuania last year and participated in many songs and dances around the sacred Fire altar. Each time I felt enlivened, encouraged, peaceful, nurtured and safe. My internal eternal Fire was really stoked and I felt warm and even blinded by the brightness of the flame! Since returning to Australia and not having my weekly singing rehearsals, my internal fire has dimmed a little, but still burning strong within me. I think I need to reconnect with a Lithuanian choir here in Australia to get my fix! :)

The key to finding your own path can be found in connecting to the words of the old, ancient and wise. The ancient words of tales, incantations and songs have a special power while all words still have the power to transform your mind body and Spirit. Negative words have equal power but I don't want to give negative power, energy here, so I won't speak about it. I will say however, that negative words has equal power to be destructive for your Soul and Being.

How has finding Romuva transformed me, you may ask?

* I have found total peace at various times in my life when harmony is established in my life. I understand that Harmony is never static and constantly changes and so I must constantly strive to re-establish Harmony. I have learnt to be flexible so I can change, when needed, and continue to strive in order to maintain, foster, nurture actions that are harmonious with my life, my community, my Gods and Goddesses and Ancestors. 

* I have become more ecologically aware as the understanding that we owe our survival to the Mother Earth and so we need to nurture Her if She is to continually nurture us. 

* I have become more grateful for the many blessings in my life that were not possible for my ancestors who really did it tough. 

* I have become more compassionate with my fellow humans and understand the need to foster community where I live. 

By adhering to Romuva:

-I see all life as sacred and eternal, animate and inanimate. From trees, animals to Rocks, Waters, Fire, Sun and Moon all have their own energy and life force which is holy and should be respected. I have always known, within myself, this universal truth and Romuva has broadened this understanding.

-I have found a morality in Romuva that isn't dictatorial but by adhering to the ways of establishing harmony, 

-I have found that living a life that acknowledges the cycles of life and the seasons in a respectful way will naturally guide you to a type of morality. This morality is not uncommon among other religious/spiritual groups with a few differences that are unique to the ancient Lithuanians. 

Lithuanian morality is defined by the following:

-Love and care for the Earth 

-Love and care for people especially those in need in your community. Love others as yourself but remembering a Lithuanian proverb that suggests, if someone throws a stone at you then, pick it up and throw it back twice as hard, so they'll think twice about doing it again. None of this turn the other cheek business!

-Respect and care for our Elders and taking time to listen to their stories.

-The importance of the stability of the family unit. I understand that today there are many variations on the traditional family model. Traditionally the family model was very set. My ancestors were very focused on the importance of marrying, having children and having functional families in order to have a functional community. The aim is still the same today but we have much more diversity in family models. Divorced couples marrying and raising each others children. De-facto and married couples fulfilling the same roles. Stay-at-home-Dads, single parent families and same sex families, all are able to function well if the same principles of love and respect, which are principles of Romuva, are practiced. The traditional principles and values of families still very much applies today and I believe that non traditional families should not be discriminated against because they don't fit the traditional model. This opinion differs from those in Lithuania who are very much anti divorce and anti gay. In Lithuania, the idea of an alternate family is unthinkable and abhorrent. We in the western world are more open minded because of historical differences. For example, Lithuania didn't experience the period of the 60's because the were oppressed and occupied by Russia where as much of the western world did experience hippy and free love philosophies.

Adhering to the tenets of Romuva has taught me many things that has brought a profound peace in my life. I know within myself that my Spirit has led me to this path for a good reason. After years of study and practice, I get it! I now feel the most complete I have ever felt in my life. I feel that I am connected to the world and Universe around me in such a real way that harmony seems to easily be found. By celebrating the seasonal and astronomical Sventes, throughout the year, connects me to the many natural cycles of Earth and Cosmos. In learning the words and language of my ancestors connects me with the past. I have learnt that there is wisdom in reading and absorbing the tales and songs of my Ancestors. Romuva has taught me that the ancient Lithuanian mythologies, customs and morals revealed in fables, tales and proverbs are not entirely redundant and many aspects are still very relevant to all of us living today and into the future.

I hope you have enjoyed reading my words on the power of words and I hope that they empower you to strengthen your own path.


References

*Reading* -note the use of a continual verb. I have found that it's not, "having read" the folktales as a once off activity but by continually and regualrily reading them reveals the underlying wisdom the more you read them.

+Suggested reading list:
Lithuanian Mythological Tales by Norbertas Velius
Lithuanian Etiological Tales by Norbertas Velius
Lithuanian folk tales by Zobarskas
Evening Song by Vytautas F Beliajus
folk tales from the Soviet Union by Raduga Publishers Moscow

Discovering the Spirit of Romuva-Romuvos Springtime customs

It must be remembered that Lithuania is in the Northern hemisphere, in the arctic circle and seasonally opposite. Even though Winters in Lithuania,  can get as cold as -45 degrees Celsius and Australia has very different climates, I think that the essence of the seasonal rites are still relevant to me here in Australia. I have found true harmony in my own life by adhering to the Lithuanian customs of my ancestors that are appropriate to Australian conditions. As Lithuania has such an extreme Winter, it is not surprising that people anticipate its' arrival a month or more before it actually arrives. The joy and celebration in the arrival of Spring is probably more deeply rooted in Lithuanian hearts and minds because of such bitter Winters. Their enthusiasm and joy is an inspiration to me. I will actually start with when peoples’ minds first turn towards the upcoming Springtime although Spring officially starts at the Spring Equinox and continue until the Summer Solstice. Then there are 4 main celebrations which I will briefly explain.

In the Wiccan calendar, recognition of the coming Springtime starts with Imbolc. This is traditionally the time when the first of the lambs are born on the farm. People everywhere start to look forward to the coming of Spring with eagerness. In the Lithuanian calendar, the time of Imbolc is celebrated in 2 separate days of celebration usually at the beginning of February. These days are called the day of Gabija, Goddess of the hearth followed by the day of Perkunas the Thunderer.

The Day of Gabija, gives thanks to the Goddess for her assistance to survive the long cold Winter nights. She gives us warmth, light and cooks our food. Gabija is also the Goddess of grains and so feasting on this day includes bread and other grain meals. The Fire of Gabija is very dear to Lithuanian people. Once, Lithuanians were described as Fire worshipers by historical chroniclers but this was simply a misunderstanding. Fire to Lithuanian people is considered to be a gateway to the realms of the Gods, Goddesses and ancestors through which offerings and prayers can be made. There is not a single Lithuanian festival celebration that does not include Fire in some way and the day of Gabija is no exception.

Death candle/candle of Perkunas made on the Day of Perkunas.

Next, 3 days later the Day of Perkunas, the Thunderer is celebrated. This is the day when people give honour to Perkunas and make death candles to protect the home and individual from Thunder strikes, ill health, misfortune and also to light at funerals to guide the Soul of the deceased to Dausos,(Paradise), to be with their ancestors. It is from this day that people keep an ear out for the first Thunder which is believed to wake Nature from Winter slumber as He shakes the very roots in the ground with his mighty peels of thunder. Once the first sound of Thunder is heard, people rejoice in the fact that Spring will not be far away.

The next Winter festival that heralds the coming Spring is called Užgavenes, also known as Mardi Gras,Carnival, Pancake Tuesday and Shrove. The last term is a Catholic references but the festival has roots purely from the Pagan customs of Lithuania.  Užgavenes is a rite to usher away Winter and welcome the coming Spring. Užgavenes is alot of fun with lots of dancing, singing and eating with costumed people who dressed as a wide variety of characters from the mundane to the mythological. People dressed as Witches, devils, Goddesses, bears, Storks, etc are common. People delight in the ritual murder of an effigy of the Hag of Winter called the More, at the end of the day.

On the first weekend of March, just a couple of weeks before the Spring Equinox in Lithuania, there is the largest folk art market in Vilnius,(the capital), than anywhere else in Eastern Europe. This festive time is a chance for people to express their national pride by buying folk art and items from local artisans. During this market called Kazuko Mugė there is a parade to honour Lithuanian Saint Kazimeras and I was proud to help carry a sculpture of Kalvelis, the Blacksmith God who is features in traditional folk tales. It is said that it was He who forged the Sun disc and threw Her into the Sky. Kalvelis features in this parade because He represents the return of the Sun after the long nights of Winter.

Lithuania celebrates the arrival of Spring at the Equinox with bonfires, Fire sculptures and Fire dances. Public Fire twirling are common. The mood of the whole country seems to shift into a different gear as people welcome longer days and anticipate much work if they live on the farm.

Velykos is Easter also known as Velykiu Velines, the Springtime remembrance of the Souls, Spirits and ancestors. which varies in April. People visit cemeteries and tend graves of Ancestors and loved ones. People exchange coloured and decorated eggs with ancient symbols of fertility and rebirth. Egg games played. Certain foods are blessed to ensure you have food all year. People whip others with Verbos,(green branch), and sprinkle with blessed water. People believe in the magic of the green branch to bless all things from cow udders, fruit trees and people. The irony that many Pagan customs survived because of the Catholic/Christian celebration called Easter! 

Just a week or two later, Lithuanians celebrate a festival called Jorė named after the Spring Thunder God. People gather in holy places like castlemounts, Rocks, lakes and Oak trees. Feasting, singing and making offerings to around 15 vegetation Gods and Goddesses to ensure a good harvest. During the festival of Jore, there are medieval re enactments of historic battles against the various Crusaders, who tried to invade Lithuania for almost 300 years!. Naturally the Pagan Lithuanians always win!

The final festival of Spring is called Gegužines when Milda, (Goddess of love) and Laima, (Goddess of fate), are honored. Single young women and men are blessed to find love and a good destiny. Laima comes to us as the Cuckoo bird and when the first sound of Her call. There is a superstition that when people hear Her for the first time, what they're doing at the time will determine the fortune of the next year. If a person has money in his pocket at the time then they will have enough money for the next year. If they are lazing then they can expect a lazy year but if working hard then there will be plenty of work that year. I'm sure you get the idea of this superstition. 

In Australia, where I live, we don't have Cuckoo birds native but I have become aware that at this time in our seasonal cycle, when the weather starts to get even warmer, the Cookool bird comes into my area. Her call is quite distinctive; I think she sounds like a chicken being strangled! I always instinctively check my pockets and take note of what I'm doing when I hear her, for the first time each year. 

I hope you have enjoyed reading about Lithuanian Pagan customs and hope that my article might inspire you with enthusiasm and joy for your own path in this season of rebirth of nature. 

DAINU SVENTE 10

Dainu Svente 2010-Folksong Festival 2010
Location: Vilnius, capital of Lithuania. Katedros Aikste,(Cathedral square), located at the base of King Gediminas' castle hill.
Background: Grand Duke Gediminas was the last Pagan King of Lithuania who ruled the Baltic lands from 1295 to 1316. His history is very interesting and can be read about in the historical chronicles and all I will say here is that he was a very smart man in diplomatic negotiations and strategies which maintained the freedoms of Lithuanian Pagans to resist Christian conversion, united Baltic tribes and iwas the founder of Vilnius. Some say that he was the champion of Lithuanian Paganism.

In the basement, underneath the cathedral and underneath the pulpit of Cathedral, still lies Gediminas' altar. On this Fire altar, sacrifices and offerings were made to Perkunas, who was the mightiest and greatest Lithuanian God, the Thunderer, and various Gods and Goddesses, including Zemyna(Earth Goddess) and Medeina Zvoruna, Hare God/Goddess of the beasts of the forest. This sacred altar was located in a royal and ancient Oak grove, which grew at the base of Gediminas' hill fort, now the site of the Cathedral.

This place has much accumulated energy from those medieval times, hundreds of years ago and so is a magnet for Romuvai people in Vilnius. Even though the Cathedral is a Christian building there are many features of the old pagan customs. The location of the Cathedral not only preserved King Gediminas altar but also located the pulpit to be right above the pulpit. The relief at the front of the Cathedral depicts the old custom of giving thanks, sacrifices and offerings to the Gods and Goddesses  through the Fire Rite!

This clip, which starts in Cathedral Square, is very poignant to the discovery of Romuva because it shows the Lithuanian Pagan/Folk custom of raising energy through song, sound and movement. I will explain the activities, to the best of my knowledge and understanding to searchers of Romuva, a better understanding themselves. I will apologise in advance as the camera man was a bit shaky in places.

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 0.13 minutes: Drums are instruments of Perkunas, the Thunder God. The sound of drums recalls one to remember the sound of thunder. The drummers here are clearly expressing peels of rolling Thunder.

1.39 mins: "People/Earthlings! Lift up your voices so that it may cross over!" People assemble in circular groups and sing a traditional song. I don't know this particular song so i can't explain it, sorry. Perhaps one of my readers can elucidate on this one.

2.21 mins: Prayer- 

"Oak!, originally from the beginning of beginnings, OAK!,lift our hearts to be free!"

Followed by rythmic beat.

4.15 mins: Prayer- 

"Zemele, dear Earth! Whom we come from!"

Followed by the "Bear dance". People growl like Bears as they sing,"Bear dancing song", and dancing like a Bear. When the music stops, people turn and grab the next person by the shoulders or hands and jump up and down, growling loudly. It's quite alot of fun too!

6.00 mins:Prayer-"visos Perkunai",(all to Perkunas, the Thunderer.)
Followed by an activity that in which I haven't personally participated. It looks fun and great for back cracking! It could also be a display of strength, alluding to the quality of mighty Perkunas as being strong. Only men are seen to do this activity.

6.30 mins:prayer-

"We lift up our feet and when we dance we will lift up our joyfulness also" .

Followed by several unfamiliar songs and dances. I can really see the energy being raised with these dances, as it inter weaves among all the participants with their songs, dances and unified intent. Binding them together with this beautiful and unique form of cohesion. This is a truly ancient form of magic which is has been described by Sir George Frazer as Sypathetic magic in his book titled, "The Golden Bough". He believes that Sympathetic magic had the aim to benefit the whole community and not a select few. I believe that his research on this topic is well founded and this old and profound form of spirituality can be seen in this whole clip of Lithuanian Romuvai and other Lithuanian folk groups.

9.14 mins: You can see footage of Krivis Jonas Trinkunas and his lovely wife,Inija.

9.48 mins:Prayer-

"If you are the Earth, do you hear us?. whether we live or die, whether we prosper or have hunger, it is because of you.

You feed us and make the path of our spirit clear! free your voice to her!"

10.12 mins: People then touch and kiss the Earth whispering a short prayer of thanks and listening for her reply. A chant to Zemyna, the Earth Goddess follows. Priestess Inija Trinkuniene leads the chant.

11.19 mins:prayer-translation to come.
Followed by a song that includes the words,

"Strength/addition to dear Father, strength/addition to dear Mother, strength/addition to dear brother, strength/addition to dear Sister"

14.50 mins: Song titled "Dobila"(Clover) is sung as all the participants exit the square and walk to Bernadine park where the songs continue.

20.30 mins:Inija Trinkuniene leads Kulgrinda singing group who strive to restore of the the old ways and promote Romuva with the traditional songs, dances and music.

27.10 mins: Kulgrinda sing, "Zemynele ziedkele",(Blossoming of Dear Zemyna)

29.10 mins: Kulgrinda sing a song about linen. This song is accompanied by actions of sowing, growing, harvesting, processing spinning, and weaving linen. Can you see the actions?. This song is a typical example of an old Lithuanian style of songs called sutartines.

33.27 mins: Krivis Jonas Trinkunas leads a song of the might, strength and pride of Vilnius city. This song has been recorded from the time of King Gediminas.

25.05 mins: Lithuanian horns are blown it the fashion of sutartines.

35.20 mins: From this point in the clip till the end, you will see various folk choirs singing traditional songs.

36.56 mins: Representatives of different areas carry flags of their area. This flag of area of Electrenai features the King of snakes which is not only a reverred Lithuanian pagan animal, but also referring back to the famous folktale called, "Egle".
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I hope this clip and my explanations have been able to reveal the Lithuanian pagan custom of raising energy through song and movement. I was very privileged to take part in many of these customs when I was in Lithuania last year. The experience was life changing for me as I felt that my eternal internal Fire was stoked into a blaze. Taking part in these customs, not only raises energy for a common celebration of nature but also raises energy within each person. Participating in these customs, really stirred genuinely cathartic revelations that served to enrich the depth and breadth of my faith, spirituality and my personal convictions in a very real and even palpable way. My understanding of energy and the purpose for raising energy has expanded. I wish all searchers of the Pagan ways could experience such ancient customs because I am sure that their own path will be enriched also. I am not advocating for some form of Christian conversion to Romuva, but instead want to offer the wider Pagans a sense of community and oneness in intent which can really raise much power to expand our awareness and help our Mother Earth in so many ways.

I see much disharmony in the Pagan community which is too complex to discuss in any detail but I believe that Mother Earth is the one unifying force of most, if not all Pagans in the world. So, my insight has lead me to see that the Pagan community will unite under Her banner,  and with songs, dance and art, we can find harmony and cohesion to work together to raise awareness of the Mother and Her needs and how we can nurture Her in a better way so that we will survive as a species. Mother Earth and Her Nature will continue until eternity and long after humans become extinct. Humans need the Earth Mother more than She needs us but with the right care and nurture of the Earth, She will care, nurture, nourish and sustain us to the point that our species and many countless other species will survive to flourish and bloom.

I believe that the sooner we reach this awareness, globally, the sooner we can evolve to the next level of spiritual enlightenment. I will always try to maintain and preserve the ancient wisdom of the Lithuanian Balts in it's pure form so that the Pagan world can hopefully benefit from our unique perspectives of the Earth, the world and their own path. Let there be Harmony!

Discovering the Spirit of Romuva- just one of the nocturnal worldviews of ancient Lithuanians

Brushed by death

The following is a poem/short story about what happened this week on Wednesday night during my journey from work to home. I have written this in the first person,present tense so that the reader can experience some of the terrifying experience. After the reading, I want to explain my own reflections and revelations as a result of the incident.

From work to home

Driving through the dark night,

 rainy, windy and stormy,

the car hit the water on the road,

time slowed and felt like it stopped,

the car seemed to glide though the air,

and spin like in a silent ballet.

I hold my breath and feel my heart stop

My eyes wide open, bracing for certain death.

This moment seemed to last forever,

waiting for this ordeal to be over.

eyes squinting, car sliding, sliding, sliding,

through small trees, I felt some ribs break

and with a shudder, crash and a bash,

the car comes to a stop in that grove.

In shock and disbelief, I sit there in the darkness,

alone, stunned, dazed, amazed and humbled.

what am I to do now? I'm alive!

the front doors wouldn't open,

car is snuggled tightly in the embrace of the trees,

I slowly climb out the back door & I'm free

Cars racing by, no one stopping to offer help.

Where are the Samaritans? Where are the Angels?

no one able, no one willing.

To the nearest exit on the freeway,

Walked a kilometre in the rain,

broken ribs throbbing with pain,

rain soaking me to the bone

feeling fragile and in need of assistance, I reach for my phone,

to call a friend to ask for help.

 I am relieved, I am met & rescued.

 The experience was scary and, in short, it renewed my passion for living life, in the beauty of the here and now. The experience reminded me, yet again, that the length of time in each life, that we live here on earth, is finite and every moment,every experience should be valued as though it could be your last opportunity to experience it. The lesson for me is to avoid procrastinating when possible. I understand that life can be fragile, fleeting and brief so take every opportunity to live life the best you can.   Just as most Cicadas only live 4-7 weeks, (some up to 17years), and they achieve their life goal! how much mofre time and opportunities do we get to evolve as a species with 50-90 years?! 

The fatal deception for those who believe in reincarnation, (myself included) , is the belief that time can be wasted in procrastination because there'll have many more lives in which to have the experiences and learn the lessons that aren't experienced in this current lifetime! I believe this philosophy is misguided and contradicts my own understanding of the Universal Truth in this case. I personally believe that the opportunities to have certain experiences may only limited to a particular lifetime or particular lifetimes, and not in all lifetimes. Just one simple example to explain this theory could be when a Soul born into wealth and health will have a different set of experiences and life lessons than a Soul who is born into poverty and ill health.

In so many aspects of this accident, I can truly say that I felt the presence of my Ancestors, Gods, Goddesses and Spirits of Nature. I will explain,firstly, the fact that I survived, relatively unharmed re affirms that the Goddess Laima has bestowed me with a well woven sash of many colors and patterns with many twists and curves, all of which I give thanks to her. A long time ago, at my bEarth, Laima petitioned with Dievas Sky God to have a favorable outcome to this accident and not allow her sister Giltine, (Goddess of Death), to cut my threads to my sash. Even despite the natural activity of Lietuvonis, Audra and Vejas. (God of Rain and daughters of Perkunas, the Thunderer, God of Storm and God of Wind), my thread was not meant to be cut! The harmony of these seemingly opposing forces of Nature, (Celestial,atmospheric, Spiritual and Earthly). These energies are revealed to me, in the form of Spirits, Gods and Goddesses, and I believe, showed me benevolence, by the fact that the small Trees whom I crashed into, cushioned the impact rather than resisting and thereby causing more injury and perhaps even my death. There are so many factors that could have made this experience so much worse but I did feel that I was being looked after.

Lastly but certainly not least, the genetic inheritance from my ancestors has given me my physical constitution and resilience which, I'm sure, is the reason that my bloodline has lasted to this day. I have been influenced and even guided, not only on this day, but also throughout my life by the combination of influences from my ancestral familial fortune and fate, and also by the journey of my own eternal Fire flame, my Spirit, through the Uni-verse and the full Song, (of which no one has yet heard it, in it's amazingly intricate entirety). The fortitude bestowed by my ancestors and ample allotment in this lifetime gives me a confident assurance and even certainty that the Goddess Laima has woven me a great sash which wasn't destined to end in this scary night.  

One more analogy of the accident is revealed in the title of this poem, "From work to home". Work represents to me as the mundane, routine part of my life and ,"Home", represents not only our physical home but also our individual emotional, mental and spiritual home which comes from our ancestral heritage. Our home is our castle as they say, and the strength of our home and self awareness of who I am in my home will determine how much success that I will experience in life. I can honestly say that this experience helped me to re assess priorities, in my personal life, in my home, and once again,  put issues and attitudes toward my mundane world of work in it's appropriate place in my life. Sometimes it takes an event like this to find focus life and sometimes it's just a loud reminder. I just wish lessons like this weren't so dramatic but I guess so long as the point is made and learnt, I won't have to repeat the lesson in possibly more drastic circumstances. What can I say but,"message received with thanks".